Halloweenie part 1

Halloween is the magical time of year when girls get to dress like sluts and no one can say anything bad about them, to paraphrase Mean Girls. As a 23-year-old girl I'm obviously going to be involving myself in that tradition somehow. Every time Halloween comes around, though, I always want to do more than go to the bar in a slutty yet ironic yet hilarious outfit. The problem is I'm an L7 Hallo-weenie (if you don't get the reference we can't be friends). I hate scary stuff. The list of things that scare me is a mile long, and at the top of that list is the general idea of stuff popping out of nowhere. This is why I can't go to haunted houses or see most scary movies. They rely on the "stuff popping out of nowhere" scare tactic heavily, which gives me anxiety and nightmares. Even the trailer for the new Paranormal Activity movie coming out has already given me nightmares. So, AMC, you can keep your Nightmare on Elm Street marathons. And Pontiac, MI, you will not see me anywhere near the "insane asylum" death trap you call a haunted house. This year is going to be different. No, I'm not going to man up and go see that awful Katie Holmes scarefest. I'm not going to a haunted house to punch another Ghostface -this guy, not this guy- in the stomach (yes, that happened. I was 14.). This year I'm going to embrace my Halloweenie-ness. I'm going to watch Halloweentown, eat candy, get drunk and dress like a slut in peace. Thank you.

I'm a mouse. duh.